The Phrase I Am Trying To Eliminate From Our Household
I know this is a little ironic based on my last entry, but there is a phrase that my two little guys say at least 20 times a day that drives me up the fucking wall. "I win." Aaaarrrrggghhhhhh.
I am not some uber-hippie who believes that competition is the root of all evil or anything like that. I am all for a friendly race down the sidewalk. But this is more than that. I win to the table! I win to the swing! I win to the bath! I win getting dressed! I win brushing teeth! Seriously. I could go on, but I will spare you. Let's just say that I have solid evidence that my boys will be seeing who can pee the furthest once Quinn is out of diapers.
What is it about little boys that they feel the need to make everything into a competition or race of some sort? I tried to give them a warm and fuzzy story about how it is better to brush your teeth longer, so the real winners are the boys who brush teeth slowly, but it didn't fly. Ditto on my attempt to convince them that brothers should be friends and support each other, not try to beat each other. Just some blank stares and obligatory nods on that one.
There is some comfort in all of this. I did a little internet digging on the topic (as I do in every situation where I need info on something -- what's a library again?) and it turns out that the boys are textbook cases. So I am not alone. Furthermore, unlike little girls who typically compete to feel superior and/ or make some other little girl feel less superior (that is the website talking, not me, but having been a little girl myself I mostly agree with it), boys compete merely as a way of establishing their identities. In other words, they mean no ill will toward their competitor. So that is a relief.
This doesn't make the "I wins" any less grating, however. At what point does one consider duct tape as a parenting tool?
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On a side note, I think I have the all-time winner for the CREEPIEST Google search ever that someone used to find my blog. Chag, I know you have some good ones, but this one takes the cake. Brace yourself:
how to get into my stepdaughters pants what to say or do
What the fuck? Is this dude for real? That is just so sick. I wish I had some way of warning the stepdaughter, or better yet the police. Doesn't that just make you feel gross?
posted by Amy @ 10:09 PM
9 comments
9 Comments:
OH MY GOD. That is hideous. HIDEOUS.
You're right! You win! I've gotten variations of phrases using the words dad daughter sex porn fellatio butt, but I've never had someone searching for ADVICE for something so sickening.
That search is awful - I also wish there was some way someone could be alerted about that.
I have two boys also (the younger is named Quinn, too!) and they're doing the competition thing as well - not so much with the "I win" phrase per se, but just general overt pleas for attention from both of them...loudly...and at the same time. ARGH!
OMG..I would say that takes the prize - frightening!!!
Eewww! That is so sub-human. Were there always people like that, or are they a product of crowding or something in modern society? Anyway, they've got to be put down. It's for the good of the herd.
Holy freakin' cow! You should track down that IP and report the sicko!
ACK!!! What was in your site to bring them to you?
I also wish there was a way to turn the monster in.
"Jack's Raging Mommy" has started recording IP addresses of creepy searches like that one and sending them in to the FBI. She contacted them beforehand, I think, and they said she could do it. I -think-. I know she researched it. It seems like a good idea to me...
i win. or else.
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